Just to be clear from the outset, this post is a rant against the type of mum that does not reply to birthday party invites. If you're one of them, please read on and learn how irritating your behaviour is for those parents trying to plan a party. Maybe, just maybe, you will change your ways after reading...
Lucky is the new boy in class. It's his birthday tomorrow (6 - he's so excited) so we decided to hold a party at home, order a bouncy castle, stoke the BBQ up and open the house to parents as well as children to try to get to know a few of the adults. A fine idea.
Or so we thought.
Lucky chose 15 kids from his class to invite. We distributed the invites in good time in early May. Cool.
Not so cool.
At the start of this week, we were down 7 replies from the 15 class mates. 7 REPLIES!!! Almost half had failed to respond a week before the party. Now, I know we're new, and maybe some of the mums don't know who I am, but where I come from that is just plain and unadulterated rudeness.
So, come Monday, I kicked into action and through a process of elimination (hanging outside the classroom with Lucky, getting him to name (and shame in my books) his classmates and by association, their mum or dad. We successfully identified 4 of the guilty mums and approached them. All were apologetic, all offered feeble excuses, all planned on coming. And just when were you planning on letting me know, I felt like asking. Instead I grinned and beared it and pretended to be delighted we were to be deigned by their presence.
The last 3 rogue mums are still at large. I stood next to one of them at Sports Day this morning, knowing full well that she knows who I am, and knowing full well that she hasn't yet replied and there's only 2 DAYS TO GO!!! Well, I refused to ask her, thinking 'sod you - if you want to be rude, I don't really want you in my house anyway' (being in the school playing fields, I didn't feel at all bad about my childish behaviour.)
What it boils down to is this - this party's not just about Lucky being accepted in his new class. It's as much about me being accepted as well, but being accepted is such bloody hard work.
Well hello there
8 years ago
9 comments:
Funny you should post this. I'm new to this party lark, but I recently replied to an invite my daughter received from nursery and the mum said "Thank you for replying".
I thought that was a very odd thing to say, but now I understand. Why would someone not reply to an invitation?
ouch, you are scary Red! The golden rule is always assume everyone is coming, whether they reply or not.
I'm raising my head high above the parapet here (i've had a big glass of wine in order to do so), but I am one of those women who forgets to reply. Worse, I have vegetarian children and I often forget to mention that too. Arrgh, go on, do your worse, savage me!
It's becoz i have 4 children and I'm very crap at administration. Hmm, did I just hear you think, 'well why have 4 children if you can't manage to look after them properly?'...a very valid point ;-)
Pigx
working mum - I remember thinking that was strange too when I just started out on the party circuit - now we know, eh? As my hubbie often says, 'there's nowt queer as folk' x
Pig - you are brave to admit to being one of 'them'...but because I love your blog and you make me laugh AND you have 4 kids (said in wonder and admiration) and also because I have a diary intolerant child coming, so I'm hoping to try out one of those delish recipes of yours to make it special for him too, then Pig, you're off the hook - but just this once, mind x
What's diary intolerent? Do they forget to turn up at the right place at the right time?!
Seriously, my friend's child was dairy intolerent and her doctor told her of a treatment to cure her of it when she was about 8 or 9 years old. It's a little known fact that they can grow out of it, but need to have dairy reintroduced in a controlled way to get their bodies used to it again (it involved about a week of child being sick which was difficult to go through but now she can eat anything). Hope that helps. WM x
I have an almost clean record. I did forget once and I remember apologising profusely, lamely excusing myself and hoping I wouldn't be in the parents' bad books for long. Amy (my daughter) doesn't have parties anymore because she just can't cope with them (she's autistic). We don't get invited to many parties either which is fair enough because our reply is always the same - thanks, but no thanks. Then Amy turns up at school with a small gift and a card (my way of saying thanks for the invite). But in the days when Amy did have parties I went through exactly what you're talking about. The worst excuse I ever got from a mum was when Amy was turning four. I sent out invites (about twenty - it was a big bash!), got most back I'm pleased to say but when I asked this mum just two days before the party she told me her boy was having his hair cut that day. Now that's what I call rude. In those days I was a little paranoid as Amy had only just been diagnosed. Some of the parents used to give me a wide berth just in case Amy got friendly with their little treasure.
Sorry, gone on a bit there!!
Crystal xx
I've been lucky enough to have 3 children, the oldest of whom is 16 now. Quite often I've found that other mummies are weird, don't waste anytime trying to understand the politics of the school gate, just keep your head down and eventually you won't need the mummy mafia
Did the child of the woman at sports day turn up?!
god, I'm relieved. Have been a bit stressed about being honest, it's very unlike me!
Pigx
hmm, and according to Auntiegwen I'm weird and understand nothing of politics...time for another drink
WM - that did make me laugh! In fact I think I have that intolerance to diaries, always running behind and turning up late...
crystal - Lucky's little friend Jospeh (from his last school) is autistic and talking with his mum, she faces exactly what you outlined in your comment. It is very isolating for her sometimes. All I can say is that the kids don't seem to notice it and Joseph is just Jospeh to them, and they love him for what he is. I'm sure it's the same with Amy x
auntiegwen - I hear you! Especially when you turn up at a new school and don't understand the lay of the land at all. BTW - SATC was FAN-BLOODY-TASTIC!
EB - no she didn't! But I did have one non-replier turn up a day and 45 mins late! But I and Lucky felt bad for the little lad, so we kept him for a play and for tea and gave him a party bag. See what trouble these mums can cause? Menaces.
pig - may I suggest returning to your lying ways and lying low on this subject for a while? x
Post a Comment